The importance of parenthood and its role for positive Development in children.

 

The importance of parenthood and its role for positive Development in children.

Parents are the guiding light in a child's life and lay the foundation for children to nurture and grow. They equip them with the necessary skills in life. They pass on their legacies, protect and make endless sacrifices for their kids.

The world is changing as quickly as they grow. Often the sleepless nights and worries seem endless. On this particular Sunday, we honor all parents who do everything to raise and protect their children. Parents Day has various dates in various countries of the world. But most countries celebrate parent’s day on the fourth Sunday of July including India.

Parenthood was once thought to be inevitable — a destiny — for healthy fertile adults. No more. . The study says that one-third of the adults surveyed do not want to have any kids at all, with 34% of the view that having children comes in the way of their personal flexibility and growth. Many people are opting out, a life choice that still provokes debate.

Parent’s day aims to stimulate awareness of the importance of parenthood and its role in providing protection and the tools needed for positive development in children. After all, parents are the first teachers and human interaction that a child is exposed to.

Here are some tips that can help you feel more fulfilled as a parent.

 

1. Boosting Your Child's Self-Esteem

First and the most important thing. Kids start developing their sense of self as babies when they see themselves through their parents' eyes. Your tone of voice, your body language, and your every expression are absorbed by your kids. Your words and actions as a parent affect their developing self- esteem more than anything else.

Praising accomplishments, however small, will make them feel proud; letting kids do things independently will make them feel capable and strong. By contrast, belittling comments or comparing a child unfavorably with another will make kids feel worthless.

Choose your words carefully and be compassionate. Let your kids know that everyone makes mistakes and that you still love them, even when you don't love their behavior.

2. Catch Kids Being Good

Have you ever stopped to think about how many times you react negatively to your kids in a given day? You may find yourself criticizing far more often than complimenting.

The more effective approach is to catch kids doing something right: "You helped your mom setting up table today— that's so nice" or "I was watching you play with your sister and you were very patient." These statements will do more to encourage good behavior over the long run than repeated scolding.

Make a point of finding something to praise every day. Be generous with rewards — your love, hugs, and compliments can work wonders and are often reward enough.

3. Set Limits and Be Consistent With Your Discipline

Discipline is necessary in every household. The goal of discipline is to help kids choose acceptable behaviors and learn self-control. They may test the limits you establish for them, but they need those limits to grow into responsible adults.

Establishing house rules helps kids understand your expectations and develop self-control. Some rules might include: Fixed hours of TV watching or until homework is not done, and no hitting allowed amongst siblings or time limit to be at home.

A common mistake parents make is failure to follow through with the consequences. You can't discipline kids for talking back one day and ignore it the next. Being consistent and all family members on the same page teaches what you expect.

4. Make Time for Your Kids

It is often difficult for parents and kids to get together for a family meal, let alone spend quality time together. But there is probably nothing kids would like more. Get up 10 minutes earlier in the morning so you can eat breakfast with your child or play some board games or read a story book and take a walk after dinner. Kids who aren't getting the attention they want from their parents often act out or misbehave because they are sure to be noticed that way.

Adolescents seem to need less undivided attention from their parents than younger kids. Because there are fewer windows of opportunity for parents and teens to get together, parents should do their best to be available when their teen does express a desire to talk or participate in family activities. Attending concerts, games, and other events with your teen communicates caring and lets you get to know more about your child and his or her friends in important ways.

5. Be a Good Role Model

Young kids learn a lot about how to act by watching their parents. The younger they are, the more cues they take from you. Before you lash out or blow your top in front of your child, think about this: Is that how you want your child to behave when angry? Be aware that you are constantly being watched by your kids. Studies have shown that children who hit usually have a role model for aggression at home.

Model the traits you wish to see in your kids: respect, friendliness, honesty, kindness, tolerance. Exhibit unselfish behavior. Do things for other people without expecting a reward. Express thanks and offer compliments. Above all, treat your kids the way you expect other people to treat you.

As a parent, you are responsible for correcting and guiding your kids. But how you express your corrective guidance makes all the difference in how a child receives it. When you have to confront your child, avoid blaming, criticizing, or fault-finding, which undermine self-esteem and can lead to resentment. Instead, strive to nurture and encourage, even when disciplining your kids. Make sure they know that although you want and expect better next time, your love is there no matter what.

And lastly on this parents day to quote.

“Together may we give our children the roots to grow and wings to fly.”

By,

Dr. Mona Shah

Occupational Therapist, Clinical Psychologist.